Tuesday, 22 July 2014

Seeing The Worst In People

It astounds me some days how people automatically jump to the worst conclusion (or, at least, a bad one). If someone does something 'nice', it's because of some unsaid horrible reason. People think this especially if we don't particularly like said person. Oh, they gave us a bag of clothes? It's because that person wants to see us walking around in 'their' clothes. No, no, it couldn't be because they had spare clothes, and saw our family as a good family to give clothes to. The just couldn't be doing something nice.

One example: While someone parking a car, the driver the car parked it in a 'no parking spot'. I mean, everyone parks there, so that makes it OK, right? (The answer is no. Just because it's the 'norm', just because 'everyone does it' - this does not mean that it is 'OK' or 'right'. I might come back to this later). As the three people got out of the car, another lady drove past. They had taken the last 'spot' in the car park, and she was driving right past them. She stopped and leaned out her window. "That's a No Parking zone," she told them. The driver got back into thecar and drove to park the car elsewhere. One passenger's and the driver's reaction was; 'Oh, she probably wanted the park herself, and she was just annoyed, so she made it so we couldn't park there.'


We don't know her thoughts or reasons for doing what she did. Maybe she was being spiteful. Maybe she was doing something nice by pointing out that we had parked in a No Parking zone. People don't seem to think about the latter reason. No, they automatically jump to the former.

The thing is, though, that we can't read minds. We don't know what's going on in other people's heads. We don't know if they're doing something to spite us, or doing something to be nice. So what's the point in jumping to conclusions? What's the point in talking about them like that behind their backs, when they just showed some common courtesy? I, quite honestly, don't understand it.

Okay, time to go back to that other point I made up there. The one about it being 'OK' if everyone does it. Yeah, that. It's quite ridiculous, actually. If something is wrong, it's wrong. Simple. It shouldn't matter if 'everyone' is doing it, it shouldn't matter if it's the society 'norm'. If it's wrong, it's wrong, and we shouldn't do it.

Lying is wrong. People lie all the time. This doesn't make it OK. It's still wrong. Everyone knows this.
I believe that abortion is wrong. It's the society 'norm' to think it's 'OK', though. Does this mean that I'm going to waive my view? No. It's still wrong.
Parking in that parking spot is against the law. Everyone does that. It makes it OK? No. It doesn't matter who does it, or for what reason, if it's wrong, it's wrong. Simple. I don't understand why people have to complicate matters so much.

Another point is that, even if you have a good goal, if your means of reaching that goal is wrong, it's still wrong. A positive plus a negative is a negative. When people think of something really nice, something amazing, that they want to do, but the ways they fulfil this vision that they have is not right, then it doesn't really matter, because they're doing wrong things.

What do you think about people seeing the worst in others? What about the things that are considered 'normal' around us, but just aren't right? And about when people try to achieve a good goal, but use wrong means?

I've also created a Facebok page. Like it here! https://www.facebook.com/livingacrosstheriver

Sunday, 20 July 2014

Daybook - No. 5

Outside my window...
It's dark. I'm having a late night - I couldn't get into the bathroom to have my shower until midnight, and then I made a cup of tea, and now I'm writing a blog post. I really should go to bed.

I am thankful...

That I was able to spend such a wonderful week in Adelaide recently. I saw some of my closest friends, and had a generally wonderful time - I'm in the middle of typing up more detailed blog posts, which will go up as soon as the photos from my Adelaide week arrive!

I am thinking...
About my upcoming exam, and a student concert which I will be playing in tomorrow.

Learning all the time...
I'm learning more and more that there are a lot more to people than what meets the eye.

From the kitchen...
Nothing right now.. I just had a cup of chai tea!

I am creating...
I've written down the themes to a couple of pieces of music, not sure where they'll go, though!

I am working on...
Staying positive, and thinking happy thoughts. I've found myself subconsciously playing the 'glad' game (from the book Pollyanna), where you find things to be happy about all the time. It's been working like a treat!

I am going...
To mass in the morning, then driving down to a student concert.

I am hoping...
That my ear will be unblocked soon. It's been blocked for over a week - if it stays blocked for much longer, I'll see about getting it checked out. I have a cold right now, so that may be why it's blocked, but I'm not sure.

I am praying...
That everyone's lives turn out wonderfully, and that their choices lead them to happiness.

I am pondering....

What will Sydney be like? How will my exam go?

I am reading...
The Dark is Rising Sequence - Over Sea, Under Stone - by Susan Cooper

I am listening to......
Dad talking to me about a television show.

I am hearing...
The hum of the highway

I am struggling...
With a couple of personal issues in regards to thoughts on relationships.

Around the house...
Everyone is sleeping.

One of my favourite things...
Currently Chai Tea!

A few plans for this week...

TAFE and conservatorium things.

A little peek at my day...
I woke up late, then had a video call with my teacher and did some aural training for my upcoming exam. I then relaxed, played piano, and just generally chillaxed. It was a nice day!

Monday, 14 July 2014

Comparing Yourself To Others

We, as humans, like to compare ourselves to others. By doing so, we see where we excel at things, and where we fall short. This is good. This is all a part of our human growth.

The problems come through when we compare in a way that makes our faults shine through. Instead of looking up at someone and thinking "I want to improve myself to become like them." in a positive, we look up at people and feel that sinking feeling in our chest. We think that we could never be like them. We think that we could never achieve what they have achieved. We think that we're just not good enough for anything.

If you look at people and think this, or if you just think it anyway (which, by the way, you may not realise it, but it is probably caused by you subconsciously comparing yourself to others), then you need to do one thing. Stop.

These people you're looking up to: remember, they were probably like you once. They probably weren't born an amazing singer, a wonderful artist, or a fantastic writer. They worked really hard at what they loved. Also, they still have their faults. They're not perfect, nobody on this Earth is.

Please realise that you are good enough. You are an amazing human being, and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Recognize your flaws, work on them, but remember that your flaws are not the only thing that makes you a human being. You have talents. You are amazing.

Realise that, while you may not be good at singing, say, you could be one of the most loving people around. While you may not be good at talking to people, you might be awesome at playing music! If you're not good at video games, maybe you're good at puzzles.

Remember that there are always new things for you to try out - keep trying new things, and just have fun with it!Also, even if you feel like you are hopeless at something, you might actually be really good, but you just haven't realised it! I've felt like I was pretty hopeless at heaps of things, but then, one day, I realised that I actually was pretty good at it. My problem was that the better I got, the higher the bench mark went, and so did my bass threshold of 'this is horrible' (for me to do).

Keep smiling, and keep doing what you love.

What do you think about comparing yourself to others?